Suppose I live with a family member who is not nice to me. They make it a point to trouble me every day, and I get annoyed and upset. The situation is obviously not to my liking, but how I react to it will determine how it develops. If I start thinking, “Why are they always like this… how can I live with such a person…”, then the vibrations created by such thoughts will reach them and make things worse. Once I start thinking in this manner about a conflict, it no longer remains an external issue – it moves into my mind as I wrestle with various thoughts and feelings about the other person. Both conflict and harmony begin in the mind, and the external reality is just a manifestation of what I think.
Every thought I create and every word I speak about the other person will impact our relationship. Even if there is a conflict in the mind, it is best not to discuss such conflicts with others, unless it is someone who can see it from an elevated perspective and raise the quality of my thoughts, thereby helping me resolve the issue. Otherwise, if I talk to one person, they will speak to someone else about it, then a third person will hear of it, and in this way several people would soon be discussing the problem. Their intentions may be good and they may wish to help me, but when a number of people start worrying or thinking negatively about a situation, their vibrations merely add to the negativity, instead of resolving it. This happens with people’s relationships, and with their health. If you tell five people that you are not feeling well, what happens? Each of them will spread the message among their contacts, and soon dozens of people will be creating the thought that you are unwell. They may be doing it out of love and concern, but the vibrations created by their thoughts will hinder and not aid your recovery.
We tend to feel that it is natural to think this way in such circumstances. As the situation, so will be my thinking, goes the logic. But in reality, our thinking influences situations. So, what do we think in such cases? We cannot see anything good in the other person, and we tried talking to them to resolve the matter, but it did not work. Thinking of the happy times spent with them in the past is not going to change the present, and it will only make me sad. Moreover, when we think about how beautiful the past was, we are in effect rejecting the present. That is not a solution to the present problems.
The solution is to create positive thoughts and feelings about the issue. When I start telling myself, and others, that all is well and will get better, and those around me start doing the same, the collective vibrations from these thoughts will create a positive attitude, atmosphere, and possibilities that will eventually resolve the matter.
We need to be very careful about the energies we create and invite into our life with our thoughts and words. Keep thinking and talking about a problem, and you end up magnifying it – it will become a bigger problem. On the other hand, if you consciously and purposefully think that all is well, then all will be well. That is the power of the human mind.
B.K. Shivani is a well-known motivational speaker and Rajyoga teacher.