Does Telling Kids To “Hurry Up” Cause Anxiety?

Is telling your child to "hurry up" causing anxiety? We explore the concept of "Hurried Child Syndrome" and whether rushing kids leads to stress, with helpful tips for parents.

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Does Telling Kids To “Hurry Up” Cause Anxiety?

Hurried Child Syndrome, a term coined by psychologist Dr. David Elkind in 1981, refers to when children are pushed to grow up too fast. This includes overscheduling, pressure to achieve, or expecting children to act older than they are. However, it’s not an official mental health diagnosis, and evidence for this theory remains limited.

The Viral Controversy Over “Hurry Up”

The recent uproar over the phrase “hurry up” came from an Instagram post claiming it’s the top cause of anxiety in children. However, there is no concrete research linking telling children to “hurry up” to long-term anxiety.

Does Saying “Hurry Up” Really Cause Anxiety?

No direct evidence shows that telling your child to hurry up causes anxiety. While rushing might cause temporary stress, anxiety disorders are influenced by a mix of genetic and environmental factors. Research also shows that parenting accounts for only 4% of anxiety disorders in children.

More Effective Alternatives to “Hurry Up”

Instead of just saying “hurry up,” parents can be more specific, like telling a child exactly what needs to be done (e.g., “Please put your shoes on”). This helps reduce frustration and teaches time management.

Tips for Avoiding Stress When Rushing

1. Give Clear Instructions: Be specific about what needs to be done.
2. Help Build Time Management Skills: Use timers or songs to teach children about managing time.
3. Allow Extra Time: Always plan ahead to avoid rushing.
4. Let Natural Consequences Happen: Let your child face the result of being late in non-critical situations.
5. Manage Your Own Anxiety: Practice coping techniques like deep breathing when you’re running late.

 

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