Life is precious, but some habits, such as overthinking, can rob us of the joy of living. The remedy is to gain control over the mind so that we can think, speak, and do what is good for us. If we calmly consider the situations and problems we tend to overthink, we will recognise them to be not as serious or important as we had made them out to be. In most cases it is overthinking that blows up matters out of proportion.
Another fact we forget is that we are masters of our mind. This does not mean that the mind is separate from me, the soul—it is one of the faculties of the soul, and can be fully controlled. Some philosophical texts describe the mind and intellect as being separate from the soul. They are seen as part of the ‘subtle body’, with the soul being a separate, detached entity. That is not true. We are souls, sentient points of light, and the mind, intellect, and ‘sanskars’ or character traits are a part of the soul. The soul is the master of these three faculties. Understanding and accepting this fact is the first step towards attaining sovereignty over the mind.
A simple practice that helps in this is to remind ourselves every day that we are a soul, master of our mind. This replaces the old, ignorant way of thinking: ‘My mind goes here, there, and everywhere… I cannot control my thoughts….’
To stop overthinking we need to consciously create good thoughts that keep the mind engaged in a positive way. Positive affirmations about the self, a sanguine outlook, focusing on and working towards solutions rather than dwelling on and complaining about problems—all these help. Some positive thoughts have a long-lasting effect and free the mind from unnecessary and harmful thinking for a long time.
Suppose someone makes a critical remark about us. What happens then? They said what they wanted to say and left, and are probably happy about what they have done. But what is our state of mind? We are upset or indignant, with thoughts racing through the mind, ‘How could they say that…’, ‘What will others think about me….’
Our happiness vanishes, negative feelings for the other person emerge, and we keep thinking about them all day, while cooking, eating, walking—‘They don’t like me… they want to hurt me… they want to see me fail….’
Such a reaction may seem the correct way to react, but it is not. There is a better way to respond. The Gita tells us that the wise remain equanimous in the face of victory and defeat, praise and insult. If someone criticises us, we can introspect and check if there is any truth in what they said. If we are committed to self-improvement, we will welcome critical feedback and work to remove our defects. On the other hand if the other person’s comments were baseless, we can dismiss them as such.
What we are matters more than what someone says about us. Life may present myriad challenges – repeated failure, deceitful or uncooperative companions, a feeling of hopelessness—which can cause overthinking. But we can remind ourselves that the fewer thoughts we create the stronger our mind will be, and the greater will be our chances of success in any task.
B.K. Surya is a Rajyoga teacher at the Brahma Kumaris headquarters in Mount Abu, Rajasthan.